Bed Rest – The Inception

On Thursday evening I was scrambling around the nursery, rearranging the few pieces of furniture we have in an effort to make myself think that I was working on the baby’s room, which is currently cluttered with boxes and unread piles of mail. After a few near misses with a panic attack I collapsed onto a pile of laundry and fell asleep for several hours, waking later to a sore back and some severe mood swings, aimed of course at my husband.

The next morning, while I was fixing breakfast I noticed cramping in my lower abdomen.  It felt like one very long, very mild period cramp.  It persisted for over an hour, and then turned into waves of cramps, spreading into my back.  I felt lightheaded, and unable to stand (even though it wasn’t a terrible amount of pain).  Now, I hate bothering my doctor.  It seems that every time I call to complain about a weird pregnancy symptom it’s just gas or paranoia.  I felt that this instance was probably no exception, so I held off calling as long as I could.  For other preggies who are reading this, if it doesn’t feel normal, if it doesn’t feel right, just bother your doctor!

First thing the doctor did was run a non-stress test for 30 minutes.  She strapped two monitors on my belly, one to measure contractions and one to measure fetal heartbeat.  Sugar Lump was indignant at this, and spent 30 minutes landing targeted, forceful kicks and punches on the heart monitor until it nearly slipped off.  The doctor was pleased.  Next came an intra-vaginal ultrasound (that’s right, the dreaded Wand).  It was then that we discovered my cervix was beginning to shorten.  Since I am at 28 weeks pregnant, this was not good news.  I am to spend a week at home on modified bed rest, which means I am given permission to be a professional couch potato for a week before going back for more tests.

Some might take this as good news, but as I am not allowed to stand for more than 30 minutes at a time, and must spend the majority of my day reclining on my left side this is causing grumpiness and a sore neck.  I’ve spent day one compiling a list of things for me to do over the coming week, including:

– Learn Spanish.

– Make a bunch of lists and project manage everything from my weekly meals while on bed rest to how early and how long Sugar Lump will be allowed to look at the iPad when he is a toddler.

– Work on my drawing, which I stopped doing years ago.

– Look at adorable baby rooms on Apartment Therapy and cry because my baby’s nursery is a disaster that I am no longer allowed to organize.

– Write ranting blog posts.

– Spy on my neighbors and track their movements.

– Paint my finger nails.

That is as far as I have gotten.  Above all, I must remain busy, otherwise I will fret over the fate of my little baby until I lose my mind all together.


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